Saturday, 15 December 2012

Tiny Jimmy, IKEA monkey

Regular readers of this and my previous Blog, will recall my fondness for monkeys. When Darwin the pet monkey was found outside IKEA this week, in a faux shearling coat, I was mesmerised. M nicknamed Darwin, Tiny Jimmy, due to his remote resemblance to our friend Jimmy F. Not in looks but mannerisms. OK looks too.

There has been a  push to rent a Tiny Jimmy for our next Poker Event. That seems far fetched. I would like to hire a Tiny Jimmy as crew for my boat. A monkey is the stand-up comic of the animal kingdom. They also appear to be good judges of human character. It is my belief that Tiny Jimmy would dislike the same people I dislike.

DZ who we like, but lacks a sense of humour, would likely not be a favourite of Tiny Jimmy. Really if it came down to inviting a guest that Tiny Jimmy disapproved of, or inviting Tiny Jimmy back, it would be no contest.

Years ago Charlie Brown and I came up with a business case to hire a Claims Monkey for our insurance company. When you were settling a claim for a minor injury you could take, let's say $5,000, or have Claims Monkey spin a prize wheel. You could be shut out, or win as much as $20,000. Regardless of the outcome Claims Monkey would jump up and down with joy. Really everyone was a winner. DZ disapproved, which made it seem like an even better idea. As you could imagine the beer fuelled idea went nowhere.

I would never have a monkey as a pet, as they require 24-hour attention. They never sit still. If you were rich enough you could have a monkey nanny. I want a monkey around for about an hour a day. Just to brighten your day before having monkey nanny look after him for the rest of the time.

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