Thursday, 17 January 2013

Donut Girl Seeks Advice

Donut Girl has been designated by her department at work, as the person required to befriend the lonely new person. If a new co-worker is having a hard time adjusting, Donut Girl is called upon to bond with the new colleague and make them feel a part of the team. It is not work that she enjoys.

Ana Maria, the polar opposite to her sister, is exceptionally nice. Too nice! and they take advantage of her. A new co-worker in her department is having a terrible time adjusting to the workplace. She is a middle aged worker that has returned to the workforce. She has a habit of playing music at her desk. Donut Girl will not tolerate noise. She left her last apartment because her neighbour played his music too loud. Management has forced A.M. to sit next to "Loud Lonely Woman" and train her. A.M.'s sister has left the fold, so she turned to me for sage advice. I was happy to comply.

I have been happily avoiding co-workers for 25-years. I'm a champion co-worker avoider. I can alienate a colleague in minutes. I can create a life-long enemy before lunch. I'm not in Mariana's league, but I'm good for a man.

In the cartoon below I showcase the "I'm busy please leave my cube method". This is executed by turning the whole body towards the computer and away from the co-worker. The fingers should be spread in the "I'm about to type" formation. Only the head should face the offending co-worker and it should be pulled as if by a magnate towards the computer. If confronted by a clinging co-worker, an emergency phone grab followed by an audible "I've got to make this call" can be used. If still bothered the "I've got to prepare for a conference call, maybe we'll talk later" statement can be employed.

Aida and M. have tried to toughen Donut Girl, but she wasn't born with the same street toughness. Her collegial attitude has helped her bond and impress some senior people in the company and will assist in future sales scenarios. It is not all bad. I just hate to see them dump all the social misfits on her lap.

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